• Jessi Stetina


So I’ve been missing from the blog lately. To be honest, chemo and cancer in general has been kicking my ass. For a long stretch I was taken by overwhelming fatigue. To a level I’ve never experienced in my life. I would walk to the bathroom, and need to lie down for a while to recover. I could barely get out of bed. It was debilitating. And it effected my brain as well. All I could do was just sit or sleep. I wasn’t mentally able to do much at all either.

It turns out I had an infection, and had essentially zero white cells. That combo can be super dangerous, so I ended up in the hospital for a stretch. My red cells were also super low, also contributing to the fatigue. While in the hospital, I had four transfusions. Taking care of the infection, getting my white cell count up, as well as my red cells, has led to a big improvement in my energy. I’m hardly doing cartwheels, but I can get around.

Other than that, man, am I sick of hospitals. And I have to go back on Monday to start another round of chemotherapy, which is a three day inpatient treatment.

So back to the hospital. Back to trying to sleep while people are constantly in and out, taking my vitals. Back to hospital food.

It sucks. I feel like I haven’t gotten a break with having to go in for other issues. I know if I just get through this, I’ll have three weeks off. That is, in theory. As long as nothing happens and I don’t end up back in the hospital. Which is what seems to be the norm.

I try to keep a positive attitude, but it really is hard when it seems like I’m always in a hospital bed, or completely devoid of energy and useless.

But today I feel good. I hope to go to my aunt’s house tomorrow for Thanksgiving, depending on how I’m feeling. Fingers crossed I feel good.

Not a real positive post, more venting, but sometimes that helps.


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